“It takes a lot of effort to appear this effortless” – Me (on being the domestic goddess that I am)
“Awe, EXIT!” – Bebe (on dropping her toy out of reach on the floorboard)
“Daggum it, Mama. I luf you.” – Swaid (he steals hearts)
Whatever happened to Bel Biv Devoe?
I really want to own some “crime scene” tape. Really.
Why don’t I get candy when I pee in the potty?
If I put my Christmas tree up before the social worker comes, will she think I’m crazy? Or will she appreciate it as much as I do?
I wonder if my internet friends stalk me as much as I stalk them?
Leaving Jerry’s Catfish one night I noticed a young couple standing in front of my van. On impulse I pulled out my key, set the alarm off, and laughed til I almost cried when they jumped. MP was proud.
If I were Ms Universe, my platform would be “Adopt All”. First, every child would be adopted and THEN every adopted child would be given an adopted puppy/kitten/etc; thereby, ridding the world of all adoption needs. BAM. I just created World Peace.
My hair really is fantastic.