Awe- you guys like me?!

6/30/09
Oh wow, you guys. First of all, I want to thank you all for checking out this blog. I mean, I know it’s hard to escape my shameless plugs being pimped on Facebook, but whatever. There are approximately eleventy-jillion (give or take a few quillion) blogs on the World Wide Web (which will totally be referred to as “The Tri-Dub” from this point on), but you read mine and it means a lot to me! Not enough to make me cry or anything, but it does make me happy enough to keep posting. So, yay for you. I'll go eat a cookie now. As of right this very minute, I have had 316 hits on the blog. In 5 days. That’s like 63.2 people a DAY! To some of you that may not sound like a whole lot, but to me that is 63.2 people that could have been doing something else. I’m not exactly sure how’d I’d calculate the .2, but I digress.

Second of all. Has anyone else been getting “Teen Vogue?” I mean, not intentionally? It has shown up in my mailbox for the past few months and I just realized I never signed up for it. My first thought was maybe that I did and just forgot; however, after *reading* (I use the term loosely, because, really? The Big Bang: Fall’s Hottest Haircut is HARDLY Pulitzer worthy), I can say for certain that I would never have condoned this journalistic travesty into my home- not even to stoke the fire. For several reasons, but mainly because I am a grown woman, with two young children and a set of perfectly, good working eyeballs. I can SEE that you, Teen Vogue, are trying to Swan me from “schlubby conservative working mother” into “Cougar who wears neon leggings with a neck tie”, but I shall not fall into your trap of evil lies. Listen up, I’ll say it loud and I’ll say it proud:

NO.ONE.LOOKS.GOOD.IN.AN.ENSEMBLE.CONSISTING.OF.
NEON.STRETCHY.PANTS/A.METALLIC.SEQUINED.BOLERO.JACKET
/WITH.A.FLORAL.”BLANCHE.DEVEREAUX”.TOP/CINCHED.WITH.
A.FRONT.CLASPED.BELT/AND.TOPPED.WITH.A.FEDORA.AND.
MEMAW’S.SUNDAY.BROOCH. DO YOU HEAR ME? NO ONE.

Finally, I’ll bid you all adieux and end this with a few more facts:

36- I have actually hit 2 pedestrians.
37- It was accidental.


38- No one was injured. :-)

39- Daffodils are my favorite flowers. Sure they’re weeds, that just means they are $free

40- I am a coupon junkie. I use them every day, everywhere, and rarely buy anything without one.

41- I have the best frands ever.
42- My 2 closest friendships both started out as being my mortal enemies. Lacey- in 5th grade, we couldn’t stand each other, but in 6th grade we didn’t like anyone else in the class so we decided to unite. True story. And Natalie, well she hated me from the get go, but only because she is a punk and I am not. Smiley face.

43- I do not drink alcohol. Three reasons: 1- it became excessive 2- It’s out of respect for my husband who also does not drink and 3- Romans 14:13 “Let us therefore no longer pass judgement on one another, but resolve instead never to put a stumbling-block or hindrance in the way of another.*” I would never want to be someone’s stumbling block.

44- If I could make money by writing, I would totally do it.

45- I really do enjoy my job. Don’t take it personal if I don’t elaborate and give specifics like where I work. I’ll NEVER tell you that because well, I’ve already dealt with one stalker and I’m just not jonesing for another.
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Facebook Status Updates:
Christy Hill Puckett is
Wants to know who signed me up for a subscription to "Teen Vogue?" I mean, Emma Watson IS super cute, but I am a 30 year old, mother of 2. I cannot wear neon leggings with a neck tie AND maintain my dignity.