When we followed in obedience in adopting our son, we knew
there would be stares, questions, and “concerns” born out of ignorance, but we
were comfortable enough in our FAITH to bring home a child that doesn’t look
like us. Our bio son and daughter both have fair skin, blonde hair, & blue
eyes. Basically, they’re little American Swedes. I hate when people say things
like, “we don’t SEE color.” Obviously, we “see” color, but diversity is beautiful and our black son is just as handsome
and adorable as our white son. We recognize the differences in skin color
because it’s THERE, but we APPRECIATE those differences. My white son will
never have dark skin. My black son will never have light skin- BUT BOTH SONS
ARE IN THE SKIN GOD GAVE THEM AND IT’S BEAUTIFUL, NO MATTER THE COLOR. We
encourage them to be proud of their differences.
For us, the change in our worldviews stems not from adopting
a “black” child, but rather from adopting a Ugandan child. I see things
differently now from a socio-economic standpoint rather than a racial one. Let
me explain: Prior to my visiting an actual orphanage, I was clueless about
poverty. My knowledge of third world countries came from Sally Struthers and
UNICEF commercials and I wasn’t prepared for the reality-check I would receive.
Our family lives what we consider to be a “typical, upper-middle class lifestyle”
only I have realized since spending time in Africa, that THERE IS NOTHING
TYPICAL ABOUT OUR LIFE. You guys, regardless
of what your income is, you’re STILL wealthier than most people in the world. Side
note: We live in a country where people spend more on their pets than they do
in helping others. That’s messed up, y’all.
Before I visited Uganda, I wasn’t so concerned with things
like government assistance programs or education bills, or Community /Charter
Schools. I now see the importance of every one of those government run programs
and how crucial it is that they operate legitimately and effectively. Believe
it or not, free public education is not available in other countries. And education
was the ONE thing that EVERY kid we met in Uganda asked for. School isn’t free
there. In fact, school is so expensive there that most families cannot afford
to send their kids at all. Seeing that, made me realize the disadvantage that
Community or Charter Schools would put lower income neighborhoods in. Evidently,
our city has coin-tossed this idea for a while now and I’ve really never
thought twice about it until now. For me, my kids would be in a great school
with plenty of private funding available to buy resources such as iPads for
classrooms, SMART boards, etc. But what about the lower income housing? Those
kids would be disadvantaged over higher income neighborhoods. The teachers may
be just as great & the kids are just as smart, but when the funds aren’t there
to provide the same tools that “rich” schools get, it could create lower test scores,
lower GPA’s, less chances of scholarships simply because the tools aren’t
there.
I realize this post got a little scattered, but in my head
it all totally makes sense.
One last note: Someone at a nail salon once tried to
discourage me from adopting a darker skinned child because she warned, “He won’t
fit in with blacks or whites”. Nonsense.
As Christ following parents, we aren’t here to make sure our kids “fit
in” with peers. We’re here to make certain our kids STAND OUT IN FAITH. Our
goal is to lead our kids to Christ in faith and by example and then sit back
while they form Jesus-loving, God-fearing relationships with people of all
color. I don’t want my kids “fitting in” with whites or blacks or Hispanics or Asians:
I want my kids fitting in with Christ followers. True that.
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